I love when you have those moments that make you realise how far you have come in the past year.
Today I attended the Yorkshire Ladies Link networking event at Tankersley Manor. I first heard about this event this time last year. My business partner and I had a disagreement, I was really upset feeling trapped in my own business. I found an article on facebook about the event that was happening the very next day, so I booked on, told everyone that needed to know that I wouldn’t be there the next day and that was that.
The next day I nervously chose my outfit (over the knee suede boots and an oversized shirt) and headed off to the event. My first thought was how lovely it was to walk into a room full of women when I was so used to being surrounded by men. I carried on around the stall and found a few familiar faces. Though a friend that day I got talking to a lovely lady called Lisa who just happened to be a business and life coach. Instantly I found myself telling Lisa my woes and how I ended up here that day. Just saying my frustrations out aloud was so relieving. I sat and listened to the guest speakers and in all of them found some kind of commonalty, whether it be work life balance, being a women in a mans world or the pressure that we more often than not put on ourselves.
I hopped in my car that day and cried my eyes out all the way home. I had got myself into a position with my company where I was working so deeply in it that I couldn’t see a way out, I wanted to run my business but couldn’t see how I could get from where I was to that point.
Thankfully I kept Lisa’s number and attended one of her seminars (which I also cried at!) I had been feeling all these things for some many years and when you actually say them out aloud it’s really confronting. I wasn’t ready for the emotional onslaught that was to come!
In January my business partner decided he wanted out, if you haven’t already read http://www.thehouseofskirt.co.uk/2016/02/girl-boss/. I saw this as my chance to get the business going in a direction I wanted. I have never been more scared but at the same time I knew I couldn’t carry on in the vein we had been going.
This year has been the hardest and most emotional of my life.I could never have imagined the heart ache this would have caused. Many nights have been spent sat upright in bed because there was no chance of sleep. When I did sleep I would generally wake around 4am. I’ve read a lot and rediscovered my love of water-colour painting due to all the extra time!
Today I returned to Takersley Manor for the Ladies Link function. Again I saw Lisa and we spoke about how far we have come. I see Lisa fortnightly for general support, advise and mainly as a bit of accountability to make sure I’m sticking to my goals. Today I returned calm, feeling on top of work, feeling free and not trapped by my business. The past year has had so many challenges I can’t begin to tell you but it was so nice to sit there today listening to people speak and feel like the past year though not easy has been so worth it!
In a year where not a lot has gone my way it has been so wonderful to feel the support of all these great women. From Lisa to my customers, fellow business women and the awesome ladies in my weekly networking group. These lovely ladies could have easily not bothered to help but fortunately for me they have all rallied, given up their precious time and always check in whether it be a coffee, an e-mail or a call.
I am eternally grateful for the sisterhood.